This is the Voice of One.
Here we go again. Once more a would-be prophet has decided that he has figured out The End of Days. Cool! So with that in mind, here is a top ten list of Armageddon Letdowns1!
10. And heeeere’s God!
Taiwan native Hon-Ming Chen founded a toxic mix of Buddhism, Taoism, and UFOlogy called God’s Salvation Church that showed up in the U.S. in the early 90s. 160 of them set up shop in Garland, Texas in 1997. Their big prophecy: that at 12:01 a.m. on March 31, 1998, God would appear on a single TV channel across North America and save his followers from the doomed planet. So when God missed his cue and the TV show didn’t happen the group became, shall we say, confused. Chen is reported to have offered himself up to be stoned or crucified, but thankfully for him nobody took him up on it. The group dissolved, many of them going back home to Taiwan.
9. The Amazing Criswell Amazes! Not!
They called him "The Amazing Criswell." Charles Criswell King was a radio and TV broadcaster turned psychic. In March 1963, he “correctly” announced that John F Kennedy wouldn't run for re-election in 1964 because "something was going to happen to him." Riding that lucky shot to fame, Criswell predicted back in 1968 that the world would to cease to exist on August 18, 1999. Oops.
8. 88 Reasons Why Jesus Didn’t Return in 1988!
You’d think he’d be smarter than that.. Edgar C. Whisenant was a former NASA engineer and a bible student. He sold four and a half million copies of his tome, “88 Reasons Why The Rapture Could Be In 1988.” Televangelists took up the cause and started airing tips on how to get ready. This reporter, your humble servant, covered this story and recalls how folks maxed out credit cards and walked off jobs and all kinds of stuff because the end is here. Oops. Didn’t happen. I know. My camera was rolling on the Fayetteville square at the appointed hour. So when this didn’t happen, he went on to recalculate his prediction to1989, 1993, and 1994, writing books for each year. Sales weren’t so strong.
7. UFO’s To The Rescue!
I think we all remember the Heaven's Gate cult, a UFO-centered group based in San Diego. Marshall Applewhite and Bonnie Nettles were co-gurus. Their big thing was that our planet was about to be "recycled," and the only chance for human survival was to escape on a UFO trailing the Haley-Bopp Comet. On March 26, 1997 (when Hale-Bopp was at its brightest) the bodies of 39 members of the group were discovered by police. I guess they had beamed aboard the UFO by committing mass suicide. We’re still waiting for the earth to be "recycled."
6. Y2K!
Remember all the hysteria about how all computers will shut down when the year 2000 hits, because when many manufacturers made computers they didn’t put “19” in the year but just used the last two digits. For instance, 1988 was just 88 to the computer, and so when the ascending numbers suddenly become invalid we would see worldwide computer failure and Armageddon. Maybe it was the preparation that went in to forestall the computer glitch, or maybe it just was not big deal to begin with but either way Y2K was a bust. Thankfully!
5. 1844: It’s Miller Time!
He was a prosperous farmer, a devout Baptist and a man who became infatuated with prophetic symbolism. William Miller boldly predicted the coming of Christ, eventually focusing on 1844 as the date. He garnered a large following who became known as “Millerites.” When Miller Time hit in 1844, well, nothing happened. It was dubbed “The Great Disappointment.” The sect drifted away disenchanted and confused. And disappointed.
4. The Sun Goes Kaboom!! Well, maybe not.
A meteorologist by the name of Albert Porta came up with the amazing prediction that on December 17, 1919 an alignment of six planets would create such a significant magnetic current that the sun would explode, engulfing poor helpless planet Earth. Oops.
3. Nostradamus (that’s all you need to say!)
Folks have gleaned such things from his writings as Hitler’s rise, The Great Fire of London, and even the terrorist attacks of 9/11 and the death of Princess Diana. Wow. This guy was good! Well, maybe not. Apparently his so called predictions was just weird stuff he made up, and then his words have been twisted around to fit whatever someone wants it to fit. Remember his prediction that in "1999 and seven months . . . from the sky will come the great king of terror." Well, something may have fallen from the sky that day but we missed out on all the terror.
2. December 2012! Oh My! Oh My!
Here is the big one right now. It seems that the Mayan Calendar abruptly ends in December 2012. Because of this, every apocalyptic vision under the sun has been prophesied. We don’t know what will happen, but we do know this for a fact. The Mayan calendar abruptly ends in December of 2012. Who knows. Maybe they had company…like the Spanish Conquistadores? Maybe their union contract ran out? Maybe they lost interest? Maybe they ran out of stone to write it on? Stay turned, we have a year and half to go on this one!
And the number one Armageddon Letdown:
1. 5pm Local Time May 21st 2011: Panic Now!
Well, we have to put this one up because it expires tomorrow (at this writing). Some California radio pastor named Harold Camping says he has researched the Bible and says that on May 21st 2011 there will be a world wide earthquake that signals the Rapture and the end of the planet in a process that culminates with the utter destruction of earth in October of this year. The media is awash in it as his followers spread across the planet bringing the message of doom. Never mind this is not the first date he’s put forward for this to occur. There is so much that I could say here I will just leave it at this:
What part of “No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father . . .” do they not understand?2
Let’s try that again:
What part of “No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father . . . ” do they not understand?
Do you understand? I think you get the point.
I’ll see you Sunday morning!
Closed Circuit to Oak Manorites:
Thank you for your responses to prayer requests for Jordan Powers. We shall see the Lord’s will be done!
Don’t forget that on June 5th we are going to be honoring our graduates. Graduate Recognition Day is Sunday, June 5th and we will be having a reception after church. Please bring snacks, finger foods, cookies, and so forth. We will be honoring and recognizing Karina Crabb, Jordan Powers and Amber Mackey
Also, remember that this Sunday we will have our monthly board meeting. We will convene right after church services. Please make every effort to attend!
I’ll see you Sunday morning, if not before!
This is the Voice of One
Isaiah 40:2-4
2 Speak tenderly to Jerusalem,
and proclaim to her
that her hard service has been completed,
that her sin has been paid for,
that she has received from the LORD’s hand
double for all her sins.
3 A voice of one calling:
“In the desert prepare
the way for the LORD[a];
make straight in the wilderness
a highway for our God.[b]
4 Every valley shall be raised up,
every mountain and hill made low;
the rough ground shall become level,
the rugged places a plain.
1The source of much of this post is here: http://www.foxnews.com/slideshow/scitech/2011/01/01/doomsday-duds-armageddon-predictions-proven-wrong/#ixzz19oXTffHp
2 See Matthew 24:36
